pogi points

atty. argee guevarra writes for business world & is a very high-profile lawyer for his age (he's affiliated with sanlakas, a left-leaning group, and he has represented the oakwood leaders). of course, he stands out for me as the writer of "pogi points", a specific point system that determines how "pogi" a guy is. the last time i read about this was in my freshmen year at diliman. of course, some items are outdated (it's been 10 years!), but it's still a great laugh!

here are argee's pogi points [with my comments in italicized braces]:

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For a more contemporary understanding of how to score pogi points, I devised a system of prescribing pogi points to male accessories and any other attribute which might significantly contribute to a guy's gross human worth, exempting any facial distortions.

THE TRANSPO - Driving a car to school which is automatic 10 pogi points.
Chaffeur-driven 20 pogi points.
Subtract 5 if the rinky dinky type that regularly breaks down when going out on dates at Jollibee. [a Kia, a non-souped up box-typ Lancer, my orange-then black-now orange Celica would qualify for this; i don't know if there are still Geminis rolling around though.]
Add 10 pogi points if brand new.
Add 20 if it is a Japanese car and 50 if it is either a Benz or BMW. [so no points if it's an Opel or a US car? how about Ford gas guzzlers?]
A Porsche is disqualified from earning points because anyone who owns one automatically becomes a Richard Gomez clone.
No pogi points for those who carpool or who ride the jeep. [how about the FX?]
Plus 30 pogi points if you ride a mountain bike to class because green is "in".
If its a BMX or pedicab, minus 50 pogi points.

THE PEDIGREE - If the family name is associated with politics, add 10 pogi points.
If its a Marcos or a crony sounding name, subtract 50 pogi points (ill-gotten rep). [does erap count?]
If the lineage could be traced to a Spanish friar, add another 10 pogi points (tisoy muy bien!)
If its a taipan sounding name as in Sy or Gokongwei, add 20 pogi points.
No pogi points for ethnic sounding family names. [ouch! He3x!]

THE ADDRESS - A Makati address gets an automatic 5 pogi points while an Alabang address an automatic 10 pogi points.
If in Makati, Dasma, Magallanes, and Forbes, plus 20 [pre-The Fort condos],
San Lorenzo Village and San Antonio Village plus 10,
Bel Air plus 5.
10 pogi points for New Manila, Greenhills and Valle Verde.
No pogi points for those who live in Corinthian Garden because it's the popular address of corrupt Marcos generals.
In Q.C., 10 pogi points for residents or even dormers of Xavierville, La Vista, and Ayala Heights. [a true-blue bias? :>]
"Gilage(as in gilid ng La Vista) people", minus 5 pogi points.
No pogi points for Looban, Gagalangin, Calumpang, San Andres Bukid, Fairview and Novaliches residents.

THE HIGH SCHOOL - A high school diploma in the States or U.K., 20 pogi points (lamang sila sa Inglesan).
Any school abroad, plus 15 pogi points.
If an alumnus of any all-boys Catholic school, 10 pogi points.
Basta nakatapos ng high school, plus 5 pogi points.

THE SPORT - If the guy's into soccer, plus 10 pogi points.
Any racket sport (except ping-pong and pelota), plus 15 pogi points.
If engaging in not-so-popular but preppie sports like rowing, fencing, and archery as well as sepak takraw, arnis, eskrima, sikaran (indigenous sports are "in" dahil eksotik) plus 20 pogi points.
For the golf fanatic, plus 50 pogi points.
Polo, 100 pogi points.
Billiards, minus 5 pogi points.

THE LUNCH SPOT (kung saan dalas mag-lunch) - Beach House and Rodic's plus 5 pogi points. [Beach House!!!]
College cafeteria and CASAA minus 5 pogi points.
Trellis, Paseo, Rasa Singapura, SM North Food Center and any resto (except fastfood-type) along Katipunan, plus 10 pogi points.
No pogi points for those lugging a thermos lunchbox and a Coleman. [this would disqualify most of the baon-lugging work crowd now... come to think of it, why were we free to bring only cash for food, but now we have to subsist on baon? it's probably because we're now spending for our own stuff, not relying on allowances...]

THE ORG - AIESEC and its local hybrids that have chapters in DLSU, Ateneo, Miriam, Assumption and CRC [old UA&P], 20 pogi points.
Frats (the Big 7), 15 pogi points.
Basketball, Football Varsity Team and UP Mountaineers, 10 pogi points (mala machete kasi ang dating nila).
LFS, SAMASA, People's Service Corps and Center for Nationalist Studies, plus 5 pogi points because they have a conscience which is now rare among UP students.
Collegian, 25 pogi points (sipsip).

THE SYOTA - If the current squeeze or the former flame is a beauty titlist, an Absolut girl or one of Manila's Loveliest, automatic 50 pogi points. [what's an Absolut girl???]
A campus celebrity or a showbiz denizen, 40 pogi points.
If the typical pretty colegiala, 30 pogi points.
Any girl, plus 10 pogi points.
A mainstay of That's Entertainment, minus 100 pogi points. [ooh, that's nasty]

THE POGI INDEX
Mukhacne (pimple na tinubuan ng mukha) - negative pogi points
Presentable - 0-30 pogi points
Mr. Pogi (Eat Bulaga caliber) - 31-50 pogi points
Gwaping - 51-100 pogi points
Istading (Stud, kung baga) - 101-150 pogi points
Whataguy - 151-200 pogi points
Grand Debonair - 201 and above

[where does Mr. Suave fit in? he3x!]